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not Paul Maaske, Zarth Arn

Come to Sunny Island! Would this face lie to you?

Here is my idea of what the Travel Brochure might look like for the movie Maneater of Hydra:

In the mood for a tropical vacation? Come to The Baron's Island for a change of scenery. Mostly uninhabited (following the departure of the superstitious locals during that whole "vampire" incident), enjoy bicycling from one end of the island to the other, fishing in the well-stocked lake, eating gourmet meals, walking the manicured gardens, and for those lucky few, attending a guided tour of The Baron's personal botanical collection, focusing on his hobby: mutated breeds of carnivorous plants that he himself creates.

Tropical breezes will waft through your room at night, gently ruffling the hair which has fanned out across your pillow. They are unlikely to disturb or otherwise awaken you from your drunken slumber.

There is an old church on The Island, with conveniently-placed crumbling architecture. Smokers are not only tolerated, but encouraged. There is nothing to chase you on The Island, and nothing but the large vampire tree worth inexplicably running towards.

Help wanted. Mute twins welcome!

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