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cake comes to frogtown

Another day, another Smithee dream. Or at least, one that could have been a dream of a Smithee movie....

A group of people on a bus tour encounter a giant monster. People are picked off one-by-one, and finally the survivors reunite in a grim attempt to take monster down once and for all.

The funny thing is ... as people converge back on the bus to plan strategy, more people are alive than we originally thought. The mood improves. Even Yuki the Swordstress is alive -- battered and bloodied, but alive.

We talk plans as the bus drives toward the giant monster. Everyone is buckled up, because we need to survive at least until we encounter the thing, and the mountain road is steep and winding.

There are roadblocks on the way to the giant monster. Not roadblocks by the forces of authority, but normal people trying to prevent other normal people from encountering the giant monster. It's noble. It's kind. It's completely counter-productive, since we know about the giant monster and are choosing to engage it.

The worst part about these roadblocks is that each only consists of one person. But to fill out space across the road, the person always uses chocolate bars. We all felt guilty about plowing through the chocolate bars in the bus.

The best plan that we could come up with was a frontal assault. We were discussing who would be offense, who would be defense, and who would be distraction.

Suddenly, I had a brainstorm. We didn't know where the giant monster came from (the sea or outer space). We didn't know what it was called (although we were calling it Yonggary, since that was the most recent giant monster movie I'd seen).

But I realized that it had been attacking buildings with huge front lawns. The plan leapt into my head fully formed:

(1) Take the bus to Japan(*).
(2) Go to Atsuta Shrine.
(3) Convince the priests to loan us Kusanagi.
(4) Take the bus back to where the giant monster is rampaging(*).
(5) Show the monster that we have Kusanagi. We have the Grass-Cutting Sword. We are capable of taking care of our own front lawns!

(*) I have no idea why the bus was essential to our plans, but it was.