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cranky kitty

I got 99 Women, but a ... no, wait.... Never mind.

I understand that not every Women In Prison movie can be a winner -- but at this point I'd settle for two close losses and a tie. 99 Women isn't even a close loss.

Some new prisoners arrive to the prison known as the Castle of Death(*). They get the infodump, and so do we. It's an all-women's prison on an island. The warden (Mercedes McCambridge) is very strict, insisting that prisoners refer to themselves and each other by their numbers. The governor (Herbert Lom) is known to borrow a few women for his pleasure every now and then.

But the warden is a little too strict, and inmates keep dying. This attracts the attention of the new military secretary, who sends an observer (Maria Schell).

Some boring politics ensue, along with boring prisoner stuff, and finally a boring jailbreak. That's right -- a boring jailbreak! The women forge their way through the boring jungle, and run across a szedfafsdl;iiiiI'm awake!

I'm sorry, even attempting to review this movie puts me to sleep. It has too little violence or nudity to hold prurient interest, and nothing at all to appeal to the other kind of interest.

(*) Because that's its name.